WELCOME BABY BOY TWINS!

We are happy to announce our little precious miracle babies have arrived!

Welcome to the world, twin baby boys!

Elijah Kingsley ~ September 13, 2010 ~ 6:21pm ~ 5 pounds 8 ounces ~ 19 inches
Will Clarence ~ September 13, 2010 ~ 6:22pm ~ 5 pounds 3 ounces ~ 18.75 inches

Elijah and Will were born four weeks early (35 weeks and 6 days gestation) via c-section on their Grandpa Cox’s 62nd Birthday! Grandpa gets to have a birthday twin…or in this case – birthday twins…with his twin grandsons!

Elijah Kingsley is named after his great grandfather on Nick’s side, Kingsley Johnsen and Will Clarence is named after his great grandfather on my side, Clarence Cox.

Baby Boy A: Elijah



Baby Baby B: Will

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ELIJAH AND WILL!

The following was written weeks later in October, but it happened on September 13th!.....

After my doctor appointment on the morning of September 13th, as I was typing an update for the blog and scanning in our ultrasound photos to post, I got a phone call from my OBGYN. He said that more traces of protein were found in my urine from my urine sample I gave that morning. He asked me to come back in for a blood test and also to pick up supplies for a 24 hour urine sample.

I went back to the clinic and gave the blood sample and picked up the big plastic container to collect my pee for the next 24 hours. How fun! I arrived back home and urinated and collected my first sample! (Eeww!)

About an hour later, my doc called back again saying, “Well…you are having those babies today. We need you to come in because you’ll either be induced or have a c-section.” WHAT? I was in shock, to say the least. It was amazing to go from such a great doctor’s appointment just a few hours earlier, not thinking we’d have these babies for probably 3 more weeks - to suddenly being told to come right in and they’d be delivered as soon as possible.

He began explaining to me that my platelet levels were low from my blood test. He said around 140,000 are “normal” and mine were at 84,000. He said this was HELPP syndrome, which would lead to preeclampsia. HELLP syndrome stand for hemolysis - elevated liver enzymes - low platelet count.In HELLP syndrome, the mother’s liver may bleed and hemorrhage. (Not good!!) The only effective treatment is prompt delivery of the baby. If my levels dropped to 50,000, it would cause bleeding problems. He told me that it wasn’t dangerous right now and that was why we needed to have the babies come out in the next 12-24 hours, before it could change. He said it’d be our decision to either be induced or to decide on a c-section. Although he did caution that long labor would not be good with a bleeding issue. (And come to find out later that the Anesthesiologist only recommended the c-section because my platelet count was too low.) My OB said to come in to the hospital to get hooked up to machines to check on the babies and we’d proceed from there. He also told me that the good news was that I didn’t have to do the 24 hour urine sample anymore (ha ha…funny doctor!)

Nick was at work in Mankato (45 minutes away), so I called him right away to tell him to leave work. He was in shock just as I was! Next I called my sister, Jesse, and she came over to help me pack. Of course I didn’t have a bag ready, but I did have a list! We got everything together and she drove me to the hospital. Thank goodness, I don’t know if I could have handled it alone! Jesse teased me that I was calm and she was the one freaking out.

I have to give Nick some grief because it took him 2 hours to get to the hospital after I called him. He finished seeing a few patients like the good doctor that he is! (Seriously – we were going to have 2 babies…what the heck was he thinking!??!) I was at the hospital for about an hour or so before Nick arrived. They had already started an IV and my doctor had come in to explain more about the situation. The babies looked just fine on the monitors so all was so far so good. Nick arrived a few minutes after 5pm.

My OB came back in again after Nick arrived and explained everything again to him. I teased my doctor to just make the decision for us. I asked him, “If this was your wife, what would you tell her to do?” Of course he wouldn’t give me an answer. So…after much thought, we decided to go ahead and do a c-section. There were just too many factors that were against us. There was no guarantee I would deliver vaginally after being induced. And having a long labor would be dangerous to both me and the babies with my platelet levels as well. If we did the c-section right then, all the staff was already there. But if we were induced and had to do a c-section later in the night, it’d be harder to get all the staff there. And it’d probably have to be an emergency c-section and I would have to had been put out and wake up later not witnessing any of the birth. Or….the worst thing could happen – deliver one vaginally and then the second via emergency c-section.

After we decided, our doctor was pleased and he said that’s what he would have recommended in this situation. (Of course he can’t tell us that beforehand.) He said ultimately if you wanted to keep the babies safe, you’d always do a c-section and if you wanted to keep the mom safe, you’d always do a vaginal birth.

Once we said “c-section,” everything went FAST…and I mean FAST! Nick changed into his scrub getup; Jesse helped us make a few phone calls to family, then left. It was my dad’s 62nd birthday. So, it was pretty special that these babies were going to share the same birthday with their grandpa. I remember calling my dad saying, “Are you ready to share your birthday with your twin grandsons?” He didn’t seem to believe me!

I was taken away to the operating room to get my spinal. Nick said he was calling his brother at 6:05pm, then had to hang up because they were ready to bring him into the operating room. And Baby A was born at 6:21pm and Baby B at 6:22pm. Talk about getting things done efficiently! That was FAST!

The spinal went well. I didn’t even feel anything! They said it was done and I thought, “Really? I thought it was supposed to be painful!” They strapped me down on the table and my legs started getting numb fast. I remember being scared that they would start the surgery with me still being able to feel what was going on. I asked the anesthesiologist to make sure, so he pinched me again! There were so many people in there. Probably double for double babies! There was a doctor and 2 nurses for each baby. My OB, 2 nurses, and the anesthesiologist for me. And I think I saw at least 3 other people around, but I’m not sure what they were doing! That made for a total of 17 people…counting Nick, myself, and the two babies, of course!

While everything was happening I kept thinking to all the shows I watched on TV (“A Baby Story” and “Make Room for Multiples” both on TLC), comparing them to what I was going through right then in the operating room. When Nick came in, he sat by me with the video camera and digital camera ready to go. I remember the staff just talking about normal daily stuff while they were slicing and dicing me (eeww...that sounds disgusting!). It seemed just like a “fake TV show!” The time flew by (I always imagined it would seem like an eternity, but it didn’t) and before we knew it Baby A was out and I could hear the crying. As tears filled my eyes, I looked over to see him while they were cleaning and checking him out. I didn’t even feel a thing…no pressure or anything. Then one minute later, Baby B was out and more crying. It was a beautiful noise! I heard a nurse exclaim, “This was the coolest c-section ever.” They said it was because when they broke both bags of water, it was HUGE. There was a lot of liquid and it splashed everywhere on people and even out onto the floor all over the doctor’s feet!! (Glad I could cause some fun excitement for everyone!)

Also, after Baby A came out, my OB said, "You made a good decision about going with the c-section, Baby B just flipped!" After Baby A was out, that gave Baby B room to move and he did just that. He flipped around head up, into a breech position. If I had delivered vaginally and this happened, that would have caused for some interesting events. Either they would have had to try to move Baby B back into head down position from the outside or from the inside (ouch!). Or it could have made for delivering Baby A vaginally and Baby B emergency c-section, which would have been the worst case scenario!

Then, at this point of the c-section, I couldn’t breathe. The anesthesiologist told me this may happen. He said that I might feel as if I couldn’t breathe, but that I could “really” breathe just fine. It was just the nerves were not connecting with my brain from the drugs. That was the one of the craziest things I’ve ever felt. I was gasping for air thinking I couldn’t breathe, but ultimately I was breathing fine – it was just in my head. INSANE! Then I started feeling nauseous. I looked over and Nick was holding both babies wrapped up in blankies getting his photo taken. How precious!! And I was calling for someone to help me because I was going to upchuck right there on myself. How disgusting! It’s hard to throw up while laying down with your arms strapped. I just turned my head to the side and the anesthesiologist got the puke pan there just in time. Then lots of the staff left with the babies and Nick to go to the nursery to get them hooked up to oxygen and in the incubators.

So, there I was alone and my thoughts of having the babies held up next to me and getting our first family photo together never happened. I don’t remember much after this. I’m not sure how long it took to get me stitched back up and into the recovery room. I remember lying in the bed pushing the button to give myself more morphine and thinking how bad I wanted to see and hold the babies. After about 3 hours or so, after 9pm, the nurses finally let me get out of bed and into a wheel chair to go to the nursery to see the babies. I got to see them up close for the first time and hold their little hands through the holes in the incubators. I didn’t last long there, just a few minutes, as I started getting extremely weak and dizzy. (They don’t normally let you get up so soon after a major surgery!) I did throw up various times throughout the rest of the evening. I was pretty drugged up and out of it.

The rest of the night is pretty fuzzy. Nick’s parents came to visit around 11pm. I remember sleeping off and on mostly. Nick and I kept wondering about when the babies would finally be able to leave the nursery and come back in with us. We were worried as the time kept passing by. We had named the babies, but didn’t know who was who yet. We had wanted to look at them more and spend time with them to decide who was who. It was still “Baby A” and “Baby B.” But after the time kept passing, we just decided to just go alphabetical order. And so it was – even before I got to hold them, we named Baby Boy A - Elijah and Baby Boy B -Will.

Finally around 2am, about 8 hours after Elijah was born, he was able to come into the room with us. He was still hooked up to a machine to monitor his heart rate, etc. I barely remember holding him for the first time and nursing him, but there are photos to prove it! Then a little after 4am, 10 hours after Will was born, he joined us! He was also hooked up to the machine, but I held and breastfeed him as well. I ended up holding him most of the rest of the night. I do remember waking up still holding him, wondering if this was all really happening. The machines kept beeping off and on when the rates were off. We’d page the nurses and they’d come in to check on the babies.

And that was that. Our baby boys had arrived at 35 weeks 6 days gestation on their Grandpa Cox's 62nd Birthday! Our perfect little angels sent from heaven above are here!

Heading into surgery! (Check out the swollen legs and feet! OH MY!)


Waiting to have the babies!


A proud papa!


We're parents!


Touching Elijah for the first time!


Touching Will for the first time!


The first time I got to hold the twins together.

WEEK 36 OBGYN APPOINTMENT

Today was our 36 week appointment. Once again, all went well. I just love that! What a true blessing! It’s a huge accomplishment as we are at the point where any time I deliver now, we can stay in Owatonna. (Although there’s always still the chance of the babies needing to go to Mayo for the NICU if need be, but most likely not.)

The babes are growing and growing! Baby A is measuring in at 2613 grams, which is about 5 lbs. 10 oz. And Baby B is 2547 grams, which is about 5 lbs. 12 oz. That puts Baby A in the 36 percentile and Baby B in the 45 percentile. And put a total baby weight of 11 pounds 6 ounces. That’s a whole lot babies!!

Our OB said if we go full term, the babies will probably be around 6 ½ to 7 pounds each! He said they won’t grow as fast now, they sort of start “plateauing” at this point. (As a single baby does around 38 weeks.) So we don’t need to worry that they’ll be 9 pounds each by the end! (He better be right!)

I’m still 2 centimeters dilated, as I was at last week’s appointment. My 37 week appointment is on Wednesday next week. If I am more dilated, the babies could come at any time. But if I’m still not anymore dilated, we could make it weeks longer. Obviously anything can happen at anytime. I just wish I wasn’t such a planner. Not knowing when is hard for me. I’d really like to schedule it in on my calendar. Don’t the babies know that? HA HA!

I weighed in a few ounces less than last week! That’s the first time that’s happened. But then again, my appointment last week was in the afternoon and we usually go in the mornings. So that didn’t have the weight of lunch on me yet! HA!

Nick and I are so amazed and thankful the babies are happy and healthy. Here are some ultrasound photos from today!

Baby A and Baby B heads together!


Baby B


Baby A

WEEK 35 SYMPTOM UPDATE

More stretch marks have appeared above and around my belly button now. My skin is being stretched to the limits!! It’s also become very hard to control my urine. Sometimes when I sneeze, I pee a little. I’m sure you really wanted to know that, but I’m just reporting the truth!

My lower belly is extremely itchy. Usually a wet, cold washcloth helps ease the itchiness and pain. But it’s so hard not to scratch it. Along with this itching, I’ve noticed bumps on my lower stomach. I asked my OB about it and he said it’s PUPPP, Pruritic Urticarial Papules and Plaques of Pregnancy. I googled it and found it’s the most common rash in pregnant women and usually starts around 35 weeks. (So that’s right on!) The rash is very itchy, or pruritic, hence the name. It can last 6 weeks and is resolved after delivery. The most severe itching lasts for about a week. (That’s good news!) The cause of PUPPP is unknown. Another interesting fact is that 70% of women with PUPPP give birth to boys! So there’s a new hypothesis that male fetal DNA acts as a skin irritant. Interesting!

The pressure in my lower uterus is unbelievable. If I sit or lay down for even 5 minutes, by the time I get up, it’s hard to walk. The inside muscles of my legs are so sore, I have to walk really slowly and it is painful. It’s hard to lift my legs to try to get pants on even!

Will I survive the 4 remaining weeks? Time will tell!

Here I am at 35 weeks!

TWIN BOY NURSERY PHOTOS

The time has come to post the long awaited photos of the nursery! I'm excited to share these with you! The nursery for the twins is as completed as it will be, before they arrive. There are a few more personalized items I want to paint and hang up after we decide on names and they arrive! So, I'll post those later.

Nick and I had a great time bargain shopping for the best deals on cribs, etc. Nick is the ultimate researcher for everything in life! I think it's his favorite hobby! I looked a long time for a bedding crib set that I liked. And I found an amazing one, great quality, for a price less than the cheap looking ones. It pays to shop around! I just wanted to buy one crib set and therefore, got a little creative. I took the crib bumpers (they're not recommended to use in cribs for safety reasons) and used them on the outside of both cribs as bed skirts instead of the inside. The rest of the set came with the window valance, diaper holder, quilt (I hung on the wall as the main piece), and bed skirt (although we're not using that - I may make pillows or something out of it). So I just had to buy the wallpaper border to match! From there we found colors and items to match. I think it was meant to be!

It's hard to get the whole feel of the room from the photos as the room is quite small. (Especially after you fit two cribs in it!!) But we have a walk in closet off to the side in the room so that helps out tremendously! Nick and I enjoyed painting and decorating. (Although putting up the wallpaper border was an interesting experience - I'll just say we survived!) Well, maybe I enjoyed more of the decorating than Nick. :) But I'm thankful for him doing the "harder" work by putting together the cribs, dresser, shelf, etc. We make a good team.

As you can see, the room is full of wonderful gifts and goodies from so many precious family and friends in our lives. We're stocked up on clothes, toys, books, and many handmade blankets. We are so very blessed. It still seems like a dream to walk in there and see two cribs! We can't say thanks enough to all of you who have showered us with love! We are so thankful for you!

STRANGERS: Happy or Sad?

HAPPY STRANGERS:

Another of my favorite things during this pregnancy has been the shock of others when they find out I’m expecting twins. (Especially now in these last months, when my belly is HUGE, so they think I’m due anytime!) I've been amazed by the amount of strangers who talk to me! And the conversation generally goes something like this:

Stranger: Smiles while looking at my belly and says, “When’s your baby due?”

Me: “October 12th”

Stranger: Still smiles but inside is probably thinking, “What the heck? She’s HUGE!”

Me: I take a dramatic pause while they are reflecting. Then I say, “TWIN boys!!”

Stranger: He/she doesn’t always comment right away, but then an even bigger smile comes across their face! Some people even say, "You don't look big enough to be having twins!"


I love it that strangers ask questions. (Although I know lots of expecting mothers don’t.) But I’m enjoying the extra attention and care. I love smiles from strangers just walking by too. They look so happy and excited for you. It just warms my heart.


SAD STRANGERS:

As I walk around in public, I often see people looking at my belly. I know it probably doesn't bother most people and they smile and are happy to see a pregnant woman. Or else they don't even notice it at all.

But at the same time, I find myself often wondering if that person happens to be "me" sometime in the last 4 years. The woman who has been struggling for years to become pregnant and then sees a pregnant woman in the grocery store and rudely thinks, "I bet she wasn't even trying to get pregnant." I looked at pregnant women and it made me sad and resentful. It didn't make me happy. I wish no one ever had to have that feeling. And it's something you don't want to feel and then feel so horrible for having felt it. But that is a normal emotion for someone going through infertility, and that's okay.

So, I sincerely hope that no one has looked at me pregnant having it make them sad. I wish I knew who those people were when passing by, because if they only knew my story. And I'd gladly share it with them. I pray it would give them hope to never give up and trust in God's plan and in His timing...

WEEK 35 OBGYN APPOINTMENT

Today we had our 35 week appointment. We’re going in every week now! We heard the heartbeats again. I’ve gained another 2 pounds since our last appointment six days ago. That makes it a total of 41 pounds gained so far. And our doc measured my fundal height, but it can’t really be measured anymore because it’s to its max. (I did measure my belly to see how big it is “around” at home and it’s at 46.5 inches! AHH!!)

My blood pressure was a little high, but I think that was because we sat for 40 minutes past our appointment time before they brought us back. (I’m really impatient at waiting past appointment times.) So, they had me lay on my left side for a while, then took my blood pressure again, and it was normal again.

Today I got tested for the Group B Strep culture. It checks for the presence of a bacteria called streptococcus, in the vagina. About 30% of healthy women have this bacteria, and it’s not a big deal, but it can cause life-threatening infections in a newborn as they pass through when born. It can also lead to infections in the mother as well. If you test positive, they give you antibiotics before delivery and everything is fine. I’ll find out in a few days the results.

It was interesting to find out that I am 2 centimeters dilated. Our next appointment is Monday and they’ll be doing another ultrasound. Our OB said if I’m more dilated than 2 centimeters at that time, it most likely means I’ll be going into labor within the next 2 weeks! Or if it’s still at 2 centimeters on Monday, then it’s probably from the weight of both babies pushing down.

Another great appointment. Another blessing…

FEELING EXCITED, FEELING SCARED

I went back reading through these last months of my blog and I realized it seems that I sure do complain a lot! But, at the same time, I’m just mostly reporting symptoms, which of course, are going to be negative. Even though incubating two babies in a multiple pregnancy is very difficult, I wouldn’t change it for a second. Even though there are lots of pains, I do love the “yuck” of pregnancy. I wanted and prayed for this for so long, after all! And I’d go through anything to have a precious baby in my arms.

As the weeks have gone by, and now with less than 5 weeks left, my thoughts are going all over the place. I’m so thankful, overjoyed, and excited for the babies to arrive. But I’m also very scared, anxious, and insecure. I want to be a good mother. I want to be able to give each of them everything they need. I know I have more than enough love for two babies, but how do I equally split my time between them? And I realize this is hard to do with just one baby, yet alone two. Do I have everything prepared that we physically need? Am I emotionally ready?

I'm starting to think more and more about the actual delivery too. How is it all going to work? Will I deliver here? Will it be vaginally or by c-section? (Let's really hope not BOTH!) Will I be okay? And most importantly, will both babies be okay?

I just keep praying that God will hold us all close and give me the strength to handle everything. I’ve read from multiple sources that mothers of multiples have a higher risk of post partum depression. And to make that chance even higher, add mothers that have gone through IVF to become pregnant and that jumps up to a 75% chance of having post partum depression. So I qualify in both areas. This really terrifies me.

I know it will be hard, but I know it will all be okay. Like the poem below, it will be double the work, but with double the blessings!

Twenty fingers, twenty toes.
Plenty of work, heaven knows!
Four little arms to hold tight.
Four little cheeks to kiss night-night!

People say things to me, like “twins are double trouble.” And that just doesn’t help calm me. But then I saw a quote that reads, “Not double trouble, but twice blessed.” I prefer that one much better!

My youngest sister emailed a few weeks ago and wrote, "To think...those babies were nothing but a hope at the beginning of this year and now they are actually gonna be here! And really really soon!!" And she's so right! That is just amazing!! It makes all those years of trying and hoping and praying seem so long ago. To think these precious babies were just a glimmer of hope for so many years, but will soon be making their appearance. Nick and I are both so thankful and feel so blessed. Our new family is about to be born...to God be the glory!

WEEK 33 - 34 SYMPTOM UPDATE

Week 33:
I’ve been very emotional this week. I’ve checked out movies from the library to watch during my 2 hours of rest everyday, and I think I’ve cried during every one. We also had a group of friends (3 couples) over with a total of 10 children this week. I lost it halfway through the evening and had to leave the room because I suddenly started crying out of no where and couldn’t stop. I think it just hit me that I’m really scared about handling 2 babies. I just couldn’t control the tears or make it stop. Why would that happen right in the middle of everyone being there and not after? I’m an emotional mess!

My Braxton Hicks contractions continue to be uncomfortable. My entire left side of my stomach now feels like a giant bruise. My OBGYN says it’s most likely from how Baby B is positioned higher up pushing and pulling on everything. This makes lying on my left side difficult as it is extremely tender. Needless to say, sleeping has become more painful. I just can’t seem to get comfortable at all. I’m still getting up about every 2 hours to go to the bathroom. I’ve also been waking up a lot earlier in the morning as well. Sometimes I awake at 5:30am and can’t get back to sleep. Guess my body is getting me ready for no sleep with the twins!

Here I am at 33 weeks pregnant with twin boys!



Week 34:
I’m sad to report that the dreaded stretch marks have arrived this week. I can’t really see under below my belly button, but as I was rubbing lotion on, caught a glimpse of stretch marks in the mirror. I couldn’t believe it. I got out a hand mirror to take a closer look and yup, there they were. There was no mistaking it! For some reason I really thought I wouldn’t get them. Not that I believe in the magical powers of the cocoa butter cream I rub on my stomach every evening, as I’ve read stretch marks are mostly hereditary. Both my mom and sister didn’t get any, so I thought I was totally in the clear. I told my doctor that and he laughed at me and said anyone pregnant with multiples is not going to make it without stretch marks unless they deliver very early! I guess that makes sense. I will now think of them as my war wounds! Not like I’ll be wearing a bikini ever again anyway, right?!

My back is sore more often than not. The weight of my stomach is just starting to be too much! I’ve packed on a total of 39 pounds thus far. My body is just all out of whack. I’m assuming this is the cause of my extreme clumsiness as well. I often drop things, run into things, or trip. I keep telling Nick to never let me complain about my body again when I’m not pregnant. I really take for granted simple health of being able to sit and sleep without pains. Or just being able to go outside for a nice walk. Oh, how I’d love to do that right now.

34 WEEK APPOINTMENT

Just a quick update today on my doctor’s appointment. All is well! I have gained another 6 pounds since my last appointment 2.5 weeks ago. This makes for a total of 39 pounds gained so far in this pregnancy! The babies’ heartbeats were just fine. And my fundal height is measuring at 45.5 centimeters. So…big…very, very, very big.

My blood pressure is back normal again to what it’s been the entire pregnancy. (Last appointment it was higher than it normally is for me.) So, I had to give a urine sample to test for Proteinuria, which is basically protein in your urine, which can be a sign of preeclampsia. My OB wanted to check this since at my last appointment, my blood pressure was higher than normal for me. But all is fine. (Oh, and speaking of peeing in a cup when you are very pregnant - hummm...well, it's interesting. Without going into much detail, just imagine what it's like to pee in a cup when you can't see past your belly!! Yes...interesting, very interesting!)

We talked a little more about a “birth plan.” And from where our doc found the heartbeats, he’s still assuming both babies are head down, so ready for a vaginal delivery. At this point we’re planning on a vaginal delivery, but there are so many things that can come up with twins, so I’m just nervous about the whole thing. Delivering one baby has got to be nerve-wracking enough, yet alone two!! I'm trying to tell myself that whatever happens is supposed to happen and all will be okay!

My doctor is very pleased with everything and hoping that we make it through the next 2 weeks just fine. (Because then we can stay and deliver here in town. If I go into labor before 36 weeks, we have to go over to the Mayo Clinic. And he said he only gets to actually deliver 30% of his twin pregnancies, because most go into labor early and are sent over to Mayo!) I keep joking with him that I'm going to make it to 36 weeks, just for him!!

He said it's a great accomplishment to make it to 34 weeks with no bed rest or no major medical issues (other than common pregnancy symptoms) for someone carrying multiples. He said I should be very proud. And I am proud! And I feel so very blessed. I must have a uterus of steel! HA!

THE DUELING BABIES IN MY BELLY

The babies are moving around tremendously. I've felt their movements since around week 22, I believe it was. But they have consistently just become stronger and stronger! At times, the movements I feel do not stop for minutes. They just keep moving and moving. And it comes from both sides. I call them “dueling babies.” Not that I think they're fighting....but that they’re playing! You can see my stomach moving all over from the outside. Oftentimes it feels like they’re rolling around back and forth across my entire belly. Then at times, it’s just a giant poke and then I poke back and we go back and forth.

Whenever Nick puts his hand on my stomach, the boys move. I think they know when someone, especially Nick, is there on the outside. And if he talks to them, I’d say about 80% of the time, they start moving around. It’s so precious! The babies always seem to move when my niece, Ava, puts her hand on my stomach as well. They love her!

Sometimes these movements truly take my breath away. I sort of gasp for air when they move fast and hard. I even wake up at night and jump, when they kick so hard! It’s such an amazing feeling that I’m going to miss after they are out in the real world. Nick joked that they are trying to perform a “reverse c-section” by clawing with their nails from the inside….and that’s what I’m feeling and they’re trying to get out. Now that’s a pleasant thought! SCARY! AHH!!

I was recently talking with someone about when babies have hiccups while you are pregnant. I didn’t think I had ever felt that and thought it’d be a neat experience to feel. Then tonight, I think it happened for the first time. My entire belly would shake, consistently for a few minutes. It sure felt like what hiccups from inside the baby would most likely feel like. Amazing!!

Lessons That Infertility has Taught Me

I found this in a word document that I wrote sometime in 2009. Glad I found it so I could add it to the blog! :)

Lessons That Infertility has Taught Me

I’ve learned there are many who will not understand.
But there are a few who will.
Those few will help me make it through.

I’ve learned that everyone fights their own battles.
And that everyone has their own separate burdens to bear.
God will not give you anything you cannot handle.

I’ve learned it’s okay to admit I’m hurting. It’s okay to let others in.
God gets more glory when people know I really am in a storm,
Because He’s the only reason I’m making it through.

I’ve learned that even through the many moments of sadness,
There is always a small glimpse of joy.
Even the smallest amount of joy will carry me through.

I’ve learned that I feel like no knows exactly how I feel.
There is one who knows exactly I feel.
That only one is God.

I’ve learned that I believe everything happens for a reason.
And I desperately wish I knew what this reason was.
God works miracles in unanswered prayers.

I’ve learned there are many times I feel as if I have no strength left.
But God’s strength is perfect in my times of weakness.
He will keep me strong.

I’ve learned that infertility doctors are not always encouraging.
They are not always right either.
I will trust in God, not in my doctors.

I’ve learned that my heart will break when another’s baby is born.
And I will feel bad for feeling that way, but I also feel true hope.
That hope will be enough to carry me through.

I’ve learned that people will say foolish things to try to encourage you.
These things will only make you feel much worse.
And I wouldn’t wish that upon anyone.

I’ve learned that even amongst the hardest time I’ve ever faced,
I cannot compare my life to others too much.
You have no idea what their journey is all about.

I’ve learned that people will say, “Just stop trying and it will happen.”
Or “Have fun with it.”
What a joke that is.

I’ve learned that if I close my eyes
And open my heart,
God’s comfort is waiting there.

I’ve learned to appreciate the many blessings I have.

I’ve learned that some battles you have to fight alone.

I’ve learned that I am stronger than I ever thought I could be.

I’ve learned to take one day at a time.

I’ve learned to trust in God’s time, not mine.

I've learned that prayers are answered, but not in the ways we've imagined.

I’ve learned that there is always hope.
And there is always faith.
And there is always love…

I believe in miracles.

WEEK 30 - 32 SYMPTOM UPDATE

Week 30:
I’ve been asked a lot of questions about food cravings and aversions during my pregnancy. Fortunately I haven’t really had any. There’s been a few foods that I haven’t liked the smell of, such as the browning of turkey meat. And I wouldn’t necessarily say I’ve had any cravings. Although I have noticed that I love, love, love FRUIT. I just can’t seem to get enough of it. But it’s not a food craving where if we don’t have any, I make Nick run to the store to get it! And icecream...but I always love icecream so I’m not counting that either!

I just have to pose this question that I know (okay, I HOPE) most of you who have been pregnant can totally relate to. I’m now to the point where not much maternity clothing fits me anymore and even the very select few that do, it still just doesn’t feel comfortable. In fact, I just want to be naked. And bras are the worst. I feel suffocated. I lay down and my clothing shifts weird making it too hard to move the fabrics of your clothes around. Not to mention I’m so hot all the time so clothes just make it worse. Even loose fitting pants feel tight on my lower abdomen. I feel like I’m smooshing the babies. It’d be much easier to just walk around naked. If I had good shades in our house, I probably would. HA!

Week 31:
This week we were on our annual golf vacation with the Vincelli family. I tried to take it easy with lots of lying around and swimming in the pool. I barely walked at the golf course. But I still felt and experienced a lot of Braxton-Hicks Contractions. It’s not painful, just very tight and uncomfortable. Everyone says you don’t need to worry until they develop into a pattern and if there’s more than 5 in an hour. But it still doesn’t make sense to me. How do you know when it’s time to call a doctor?

I’m also losing control over my basic fine motor skills. In other words, my fingers just don’t work! I find myself dropping more and more things. On our last day of vacation, I spilt a glass of milk down my entire leg and feet at breakfast. Then an hour later, while packing up the car outside, I dropped a brand new large jug of virgin pina colada mix on the sidewalk. It broke and splattered everywhere. After crying for about 15 minutes, I calmed down. (Not because I thought it was alcohol abuse to have it go to waste...HA...but because I feel like I just don’t have any control anymore.)

Week 32:
I had a little scare this week as I was carrying a laundry basket down the stairs. I’m not exactly sure what happened, but I basically missed the last step and fell down the last stair. I landed on my knees, so it wasn’t bad, but it did hurt. My doctor said that women's ligaments really change during pregnancy. He said you can just be walking and your ankles give out. That fact made me feel a little better! Although for days afterward there was a sharp pain on my left side. It felt like a giant bruise. I’m not sure if a pulled a muscle or hit it on the basket when I fell. But that area definitely felt painful and it hurt to twist or lay on it.

I’m bummed to say that my fall hay fever allergies have arrived as well. I was really hoping that maybe this year they would stay way. I read that sometimes in pregnancy, you don’t experience your normal allergies. No such luck. So, now I have swollen and itchy, red eyes. I’m sneezing like crazy and blowing my nose every hour. And those sneezes, I can feel throughout my entire body…it hurts!! I don’t think the babies are enjoying that. I know I can still take medications, but I’m not going to unless I can’t take it anymore.

TOP 10 THINGS I WILL MISS ABOUT PREGNANCY

1.) Having two miracles grow inside of me
2.) Feeling the babies kick
3.) Smiles from strangers
4.) Special treatment
5.) Mandatory rest 2 hours every day
6.) “Expectant Mothers” parking spots at HyVee
7.) Eating for 3! (packing on those extra calories!)
8.) Being taken care of by everyone
9.) Not having to work out
10.) Listening to Nick talk to the babies inside my belly

TOP 10 THINGS I MISS ABOUT NOT BEING PREGNANT

1.) Wearing my wedding ring (my fingers are too swollen)
2.) Cute shoes (only 1 pair of flip flops fit me right now)
3.) Wine
4.) Being able to bend over and pick something up (without pain and groaning!)
5.) My feet and ankles (oftentimes they are so swollen they don’t exist)
6.) Painting my toe nails, shaving, etc.
7.) My “normal” body
8.) Sleeping though the night without back aches, stomach aches, having to get up to pee, etc. (and I really miss sleeping on my stomach!)
9.) Not feeling so much pain and being so uncomfortable!
10.) Being able to hug and cuddle with Nick without feeling uncomfortable

CAN YOU BABYSIT MY STOMACH FOR A WHILE?

Here I am at 31 weeks pregnant!

Now since I’m 32 weeks pregnant and am carrying around almost 8 pounds of babies already, I’m getting really sore and uncomfortable. The pressure in my stomach is intense. At times, I just want to remove my stomach and pass it over to a babysitter for a while. I said to my husband, Nick, “Can’t I just take this thing off for a while and you carry it around?!” Sounds horrific, I know. You’re probably thinking what a bad mother I am already. But honestly, it would be nice to have a little break from all the pressure, stress, and pain running through my entire body. It’s hard to walk and it feels like every muscle is being pulled. I’m supposed to rest a lot and take it easy, but I have so much I need to do. So, not only am I having a physical struggle with my body, but a mental one too. My brain wants to go, go, go, but my body is telling me to slow it down. However do I make both happy?

So please give me a little slack. I’ve been walking around as a full term pregnancy for over 5 weeks already and I still have 8 weeks left. Yes, I complain. Yes, I wish I didn’t complain. But I always marvel at the miracle. The more and more I think about it lately, I’ve now decided to be proud of myself and give myself a lot of credit. Incubating two babies isn’t an easy job and I think I’m doing a pretty darn good job.

Here’s to the next 8 weeks of pregnancy survival…or whenever these precious babes decide to come out into the world! I can do it!!!! I can do it!!!

32 WEEK APPOINTMENT

Today’s OBGYN appointment went great. I’ve gained another 5 pounds since my last appointment 2.5 weeks ago. Oh my! Baby A is measuring to be around 4 pounds 2 ounces (1876 grams) and Baby B is measuring to be around 3 pounds 12 ounces (1708 grams). That’s adding up to a lot of baby weight to be carrying around!! No wonder I’m so uncomfortable!

We saw the babies on ultrasound again. They’re so darn cute!! They’re always moving around...busy, busy little guys. I can’t remember which baby did this, but one kept sticking his tongue out at us. Little stinker!! They're competing for attention! And the biggest surprise of the appointment was to find out that Baby B has flipped. He’s now head down. So both babies are in good position for delivery. We shall see if they stay that way.

So, since Baby B has flipped upside down sometime within the last 2 weeks, what we thought was his head (the big mound always poking out of my stomach) was actually his butt! The area I feel the most movement in is where both of their feet are. So, they're kicking, kicking away!

Baby A is measuring at about 33 weeks (53 percentile) and Baby B is measuring at about 31 weeks 2 days (37 percentile). So all is looking great! My blood pressure was a little high, but nothing my doctor was concerned about. It was 130/80. It’s been low/normal the entire time until now. He said it’s not an issue until the lower number is in the 90’s.

My fundal height is measuring at 43 centimeters….so at 43 weeks along. Guess I’m “overdue!” HA! (Remember that a woman who gives birth to a single baby at 40 weeks measure about 36 centimeters. So, I’m big…very very very big.) My OBGYN wants me to rest on my left side with my feet up for at least 2 hours every day. I’m ordered to just try to take it easy. That is easier said than done.

We also went to the county fair the night after this appointment and I didn’t make it walking very far. Guess we’ll be staying clear of the fair this year! I did get a chocolate ice cream shake, mini donuts, and cheese curds though. I think I’m good on my nasty grease until next year’s fair!

MATERNITY PHOTOS! HAPPY 30TH TO ME!

I had a maternity pregnancy photo shoot on my 30th Birthday! My sister, Erin, took the photos. What a wonderful way to spend a few hours to help me celebrate the big 30!!

Even though I look "full term" in these photos, I'm actually only 30 weeks pregnant!

Thanks for the great photos, Erin. Such precious memories of the twins in my tummy! (Oh and a good documentation of my "fake" wedding ring since my fingers were so swollen my real wedding ring didn't fit!)

SWAGGER WAGON

Well…this wife and husband team, who have always always always said “WE’RE NEVER GETTING A MINI VAN”, have a big surprise to share. I’m sure you can guess, but yes…we bought a mini van. But it’s not really a mini van, it’s a SWAGGER WAGON. Or at least that’s what we’re calling it. The new 2011 Toyota Sienna’s slogan and commercials call them “swagger wagons.” So, even though ours isn’t new, we’re still going to use that. There’s no mini van in our garage, it’s the swagger wagon!! We traded in my precious 2007 Chevy Trailblazer for a 2010 Toyota Sienna. We couldn’t pass up such a great deal on the trade in and great deal on the van. (Which has only been used 8 months as it was a rental car.) We think it was a sign from above and meant to be.

Now, please don’t worry, because we’re still going to be cool. (Wait…is it still “cool” to say cool??) I turn 30 in a week, so I suppose this is a rite of passage. We’re officially all grown up and we’re taking convenience over style. (Although the Sienna’s are pretty fashionable, I must say.) We just knew that if I ever wanted to leave the house with the twin babies, this is the way to go. Not having to worry about doors opening out, the sliding doors that open by remote, lots of room and storage, the list goes on and on. We’re thinking ahead to survival mode. And I really feel this is going to help tremendously with carrying two infant car seats around.

I know a lot of people name their cars. I’ve never named my car by anything other than the model. Well, ours will now affectingly be known as “Camry” and “Sienna”….how original!!

Check out the Swagger Wagon video. It’s hilarious. It’s exactly how Nick and I will be.

http://www.youtube.com/user/Sienna


Here’s a goodbye photo of my baby, my Trailblazer. Goodbye, my love. I will miss you!



And here are a couple photos of the newest addition to our family – the swagger wagon. (Please prove to us that we made a wise decision!)

WEEK 27 - 29 SYMPTOM UPDATE

Week 27:
Sleeping is getting very very uncomfortable. (Although now it’s more of my tummy and back that hurt…not the pain in my legs like I’ve mentioned before. So, it’s easier to turn over than before and I’m so thankful for that!) Nick and I have switched sleeping sides of the bed, so it will be easier for me to sleep on my left side. (FYI: Sleeping on your left side during pregnancy is recommended because it benefits the baby by improving blood flow and therefore nutrients to the placenta. It also helps your kidneys efficiently eliminate waste products and fluids from your body, which in turn reduces swelling in your feet.) Our “switching sides of the bed” is due to our theory that no matter what side of the bed I’m sleeping on, I always face away from Nick. For example: I normally sleep on the left side of the bed, sleeping away from Nick on my right side. But now on the right side of the bed, I should sleep facing away from Nick on my left side.) I think it has helped a little, but I’m tired of sleeping on my left side…it just never feels comfortable anymore. I force myself to fall asleep on my left side. Then I switch back and forth between my left and right when I get up for potty breaks during the night.


Week 28:
My left hand becomes numb and my joints in my fingers are very stiff when I wake up after sleeping. I used to notice it whenever I was sleeping on my left side and figured it coincided with that. But now I’ve realized that my left hand does that when I sleep on my right side too. It goes away after a few minutes, but it’s the weirdest feeling. I also get so hot when I sleep. The ceiling fan just wasn’t cutting it anymore, so we’ve added a small fan on the shelf right next to me so

My stomach feels very tight. It’s hard to bend down and get up without moaning and feeling like I’m smooshing those poor babies. I’m sure I’ve been having Braxton Hicks contractions more and more often. No pain…just extreme tightness. It gets rock hard, and I mean rock hard!


Week 29:
For weeks, I’ve been having a stinging pain in the middle of my chest, right under my breasts. It feels like a rash, but there’s no mark on the skin. It’s not itchy, but stings and stings. It helps if I try to put a little pressure on it with my hand. My doctor said this is normal and is the cause of nerve bundles stretching inside. Crazy! Never heard of that! (But glad it’s “normal.”)

My feet still become very swollen, especially on these hot summer days. They feel so tight and bruised. If I try to rub them, it just feels like a giant bruise all over my feet.

29 WEEK OBGYN APPOINTMENT

We had another check-up today to hear the heartbeats and for me to get measured. I think I mentioned this before, but we start going to my OB every 2 weeks now, with an ultrasound every other time. I’m excited to see the boys more often. I wish I could do an ultrasound everyday. :) But no ultrasound today…next time!

It was another great appointment. Getting weighed isn’t getting much easier, but I know that means the babies are healthy. I’ve gained 3 pounds in the last 2 weeks. That puts me up to 28 pounds gained so far in this pregnancy of 29 weeks. Their heartbeats were good and strong, in the 140’s as usual. My fundal height is measuring 38.5 inches, which means - 38.5 weeks. This means that I am now officially bigger than full term for a singleton pregnancy. (A woman who is 40 weeks pregnant with a single baby usually measures at 36 weeks.) What does this mean? Well, I can’t get much bigger in that direction, but I’ll start spreading to the sides. And everyone tells me that I don’t look pregnant from the back. Which is true – my babies bump is all in the front and nothing on the sides. So will I loose that? We shall see!

So, here I am at 29 weeks with 11 weeks to go. And I’m experiencing everything a full term woman with a single baby is feeling. This pretty much means I have 11 weeks left of feeling “full term.” HOLY COW!!! It’s sort of like I skipped my whole 2nd trimester, going straight from the 1st to the 3rd. And the 3rd is lasting 6 months, instead of 3. Everyone told me their 2nd trimester was great and they felt wonderful with so much energy. Ha…I WISH!

Good thing I haven’t experienced a previous singleton pregnancy, or else I may be freaking out. Cause this just feels “normal” to me, as I don’t have anything else personally to compare it to. Does this mean if I have a future singleton pregnancy, it’s gonna seem so easy? Ha…who knows?!

My doctor confirmed that this is in fact true. (That I am feeling at this point what someone feels in their last weeks of pregnancy.) I then asked him if it was acceptable to tell others fact that, hoping they’d give me lots of sympathy. He said I can sure try, but it probably won’t work! And he said once the babies come, it for sure won’t be about me anymore. Everyone will just care for the babies. Thus, he told me to milk it for all it’s worth now!

So, if I complain to get a little sympathy, please give it to me. HA! Just don’t say what my older sister always tells me, “It’s only going to get worse!” And I assure her that payback is a $*%&@! (wink, wink)

TWIN BOY NURSERY

We are almost finished with the nursery. As if that's a surprise to anyone, since I'm such a planner. We’ve been working on it little by little for the past month and a half. Of course there are more personalized things I want to hand make after the babies arrive, but for right now, I’m so in love with it! The room is so very very teeny tiny as it can barely hold the two cribs, a bookcase, and a dresser. But it’s just perfect. And the earth toned safari animal theme turned out adorable.

Walking past the nursery and peeking in just warms my heart. I don't know when I will really believe it's all "really happening!!" Especially now with Baby Showers occurring, we are receiving more precious baby goodies and supplies. Seeing it filling with all the toys, books, and baby clothes is amazing. I love washing the clothes and folding the little teeny tiny outfits. I've imagined doing that for a long time and now that it's happening, I just smile and smile! How can those clothes be so tiny...I love it!

Here are a few photos below of the nursery in progress. (I’ll post more of the finished nursery later, as not everyone has seen it in person that we want to see it yet!)

Example photo of the nursery theme:

Nick putting together the cribs!

Painting:





Border:

Nick working on saying on wall: