NATIONAL INFERTILITY AWARENESS WEEK

It's National Infertility Awareness Week.

National Infertility Awareness Week is a project of RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association. The goal of the week is to raise awareness about infertility, to encourage grassroots advocacy, and help couples with infertility cope with their disease.

Infertility affects 1 in every 8 couples.

Nick and I are one of those eight.

7.3 million Americans are diagnosed with infertility.



There is too much negativity, fear, and shame regarding this disease. I wish we could make it disappear, but we can't. However, I can and will continue to share my infertility story. I thankful for what I have endured and extremely grateful for my twins, my IVF miracles. I am not ashamed of how my children were conceived and I will always make sure they and the rest of the world know it.

National Infertility Awareness Week is also needed to spread awareness of infertility to the general public. With infertility affecting 1 in 8, it's likely that everyone has at least one friend or family member living with infertility. When the general public understands infertility better, fertility challenged couples will be freer to talk about their condition, possibly experience less shame, and receive more support.



I don't share my story for attention.

I don't share it for pity.

I share it because there are many people out there who need your support. They may not be willing so speak out, so I will help be their voice.

No matter where you may be in your infertility journey, know you are never alone.

And remember that there is always, always, always HOPE!



For more information, check out the RESOLVE website.

FROZEN EMBRYO TRANSFER

As you may have read from my previous blog post, I was feeling overwhelmed and decided to step back a bit from my blog in January. It is hard to believe that my last blog post was over 3 months ago! But now it is time for an update. And I will tell you more of the reason I wanted to be a little more stress free...

We've had a lot going on between day to day life, volunteering, working, etc., but the biggest thing is that we have been trying to grow our family. :) In May of 2012, when the twins were about 20 months old, we started trying for another baby. But after over 6 months of no success, we felt it was time to go back to the Mayo Clinic to start the IVF (In-Vitro) process again. Although this time it would be a FET (Frozen Embryo Transfer) since we had 8 frozen embryos in storage.

Those four months (Nov 2012 - Feb 2013) were full of questions and decisions, sadness and disappointments, but also happiness, faith and hope. It was interesting to right in the infertility world again. I stepped back into that uncertainty and sadness. And just like that, I was immediately pumped full of hormones and medications again. All I could think was, "Here we go again!" Although many feelings came rushing back, it was definitely different this time. As apprehensive as I was to go through this process again and not knowing if we would become pregnant, I was able to focus on my two little miracles that I do have. Because this time I knew that technically, I could get pregnant, and I am able to have children. Whereas, the first time, we had no idea if I would ever be able to bear a child.

Here is photo proof of my many medications and needles...(Luprolide, Estradiol, Progesterone Suppositories, Progesterone Capsules, and Necon)

Some fertility medications have to come from Specialty Pharmacies. My Luprolide kits were shipped all the way from Texas!



Collection of my used needles...



This was the most expensive medication for this round. I will spare you from the details of the cost, but I took a photo of it next to the quarter so you can see how tiny of an amount it is. And the bottle only comes half full of medication! (You can see the line about half way up the bottle. That was the full amount.)



So, after four months including 6 trips to the Mayo Clinic in Rochester for appointments (with RE's (Reproductive Endocrinologists), nurses, and ultrasound techs), 33 vaginal suppositories, 3 blood draws, 2 vaginal ultrasounds, giving myself 31 shots, and taking 177 pills, - on February 14, (Valentine's Day) we did a Frozen Embryo Transfer (FET) at the Department of Reproductive Endocrinology and they transferred one strong, healthy embryo into my uterus.

Here we are relaxing after I had some valium before our transfer...hoping and praying for a baby to grow, grow, grow!



And here I am waiting in the hospital room to be wheeled down to the Operating Room!



This photo was while we were waiting in Pre-Op. As you can clearly see, it was a super romantic Valentine's Day for us! We really know how to dress fancy for such a special occasion. :)



All ready to go! Let's make a baby already!



My handsome husband in his fancy scrubs.



We got in trouble from a nurse after taking this photo because apparently cameras aren't allowed in pre-op. Oops! We probably wouldn't have been busted, but we were laughing so loud taking these pics, I think they knew what we were up too. Or I guess it was probably the flash that gave it away! Some people just don't know how to have fun. Don't they know this was like our foreplay? :)(Sorry, I know, too much information...ha!)

The transfer went well except for my bladder issue. You need a full bladder for the procedure, but apparently, my bladder was TOO full. You aren't able to urinate after being admitted into the hospital. And your procedure isn't right away as there is a lot of waiting even before you get to pre-op to wait again. Keep in mind I hadn't peed in about 4 hours.Oh my! Therefore, the entire procedure was quite painful. The pressure on my bladder was almost too much to bear. I was able to hold it for the transfer, but then had to use a bed pan, right there while laying down in the operating room immediately after the doctors were finished. (This is because you have to lay flat on bedrest for one hour after the transfer. So I wasn't able to get up to use the bathroom.) Ughh...I felt so stupid. But I have never felt such relief after urinating before. (again...too much information...sorry!)

I'm glad I made it through, but was disappointed that it wasn't the sweet and touching "watch the embryo on the ultrasound screen being inserted into my uterus" special moment. Instead I was gripping Nick's hand so hard and trying to take deep breaths while focusing on not peeing right there all over the doctor. Through my gritted teeth, I asked the resident doctor, "Are you sure I'm not peeing, because I feel like I'm peeing right now." I truly was so sure I was letting it all out right there. What a weird feeling. But He said no and although he then reassured me that it has happened to him before, I certainly didn't want to be the one to pee on him again. I glanced at the monitor, but honestly didn't even see the embryo pop out of the catheter! It was definitely different than our first IVF, as I vividly remember seeing the two little embryos pop out and float around! So special...so incredible to witness. This time I wasn't even sure they had put an embryo in me. Oh well, it was done and I could finally pee. I was happy.

One other funny moment was that when the embryologist entered, my main doctor said, "And here are your embryos." I said, "EMBRYOS!?!?" And he replied, "Oh, I mean embryo." We joked that yes, it better just be one! (We had decided to transfer only one embryo. More details are a few paragraphs down.)

While waiting on bedrest, I joked and imagined how fun it was going to be to tell people that I got pregnant from a man who wasn't my husband on Valentine's Day, while a room full of other men and women AND my husband watched! :)

We prayed and prayed for our miracle. We were full of such hope and faith that our special little Valentine's embryo would survive and grow into a strong and healthy baby.

And so the 2 week wait began.

Soon after the transfer, we got the call that our second embryo didn't survive the thaw and that it would be unable to be refrozen for future use. For this transfer, we had decided to thaw two embryos and transfer the best one, with the hopes of refreezing the other embryo to keep for the future. We honestly were not ready to take the chance to have twins again. We wanted to try for a singleton. And obviously using two embryos would increase the chance for twins. We were pretty confident that if two embryos were put in, two babies would come out. Just as we had experienced the first time. So, thaw two, transfer the best one it was. The embryologist grew the second embryo out for a few more days, but unfortunately, it did not survive to the blastocyst stage. Therefore, they were unable to re-freeze it. This meant we now had 6 frozen embryos remaining. I was sad and cried after hearing that news. You really do grow attached to these little embryos that could be your future children! And now we had one less. One less chance for a baby than we had before.

Unfortunately, a few days before the transfer, the twins got colds. And of course, it was passed on to me. But mine turned into a horrible sinus infection that I had during the entire time while I was waiting to find out if I was pregnant. I had to pretend I was pregnant, even though we didn't know if I was. Therefore, I couldn't take any medication and had to suffer through it. I had never had a sinus infection before. And wow, the pain was unbearable. It felt as if every tooth in my mouth needed to be pulled. It ached and ached and there was nothing I could do. I did try taking Tylenol, but it didn't help at all. Most nights, it was difficult to sleep and I woke up often. One night the pain was so intense, I barely slept all night long. The pain finally subsided around 8am and I was able to fall asleep and stay sleeping for a few hours. Thankfully that was a Saturday, so Nick was home and able to watch the twins. For a little over those 2 weeks, I couldn’t smell or taste. And during most of that time, it hurt to even open my mouth or chew food. It is hard to describe, but the pain in my mouth was so horrible. I couldn't believe the timing of all of this as I am rarely ever sick. I worried that this would affect my body trying to become pregnant.

Needless to say, the “2 week wait” was hard. Hard because I was so sick and hard because I couldn't even enjoy food since it hurt so much to even open my mouth, yet alone chew. But even harder because I was given restrictions to not lift more than 25 pounds, which meant I couldn’t lift my twins. They quickly learned how to climb on the toilet themselves and to get up into their tall car seats without my help. You never realize how much you really do pick up your children on a daily basis, until you aren't able to. I missed holding them so dearly. There were many times they would stand at my feet holding their arms up for me to pick them up and hold them. They just didn’t understand why I wasn't able to lift them.

Although the wait was hard and time seemed to go by slowly, it actually passed by faster than I had imagined. It's hard to keep it off your mind when you are still taking estrogen and progesterone 3 times a day (at 7am, 3pm, and 10 pm for a total of 6 estradiol tablets and 3 vaginal suppositories). But being with the twins obviously occupied a lot of my time, so I think that helped tremendously.

In my mind and heart, I began preparing for our little baby that would arrive in November. I imagined what craziness Christmas would be this year with another baby in our arms. I thought about how much fun Eli and Will would have holding and feeding a little brother or sister. (I know this since they adore any babies they see and always want to touch, kiss, and help feed babies!)I even purchased shirts that said "big brother" for Eli and Will and thought about how and when we would announce our pregnancy to the world.

So finally, on the morning of February 25, I drove to Mayo to take a blood test to verify if there was a pregnancy. I hadn't and didn't want to take a home pregnancy test for the fear of a false negative or a false positive. Mayo recommends not doing that since all of the medications and hormones I was still on could affect a home pregnancy test and not give correct results. So, since Nick had to work all day and we obviously wanted to find out together, that evening, Nick and I listened to the message on labtalk from the Mayo Clinic Department of Reproductive Endocrinology and found out our worst fear....

Not pregnant.

At first I just starred at Nick. Then I looked away and said, "I knew it." At first, I felt like I didn't have any emotion.

Then suddenly it hit.

My heart felt broken.

My hope felt crushed.

I cried and cried.

And I cried some more.

And when I felt as if I couldn't have any tears left, I cried even more.

All the pain and frustrations came flooding back. Why? Why? Why didn't this work? I know I can get pregnant. These specialized doctors literally placed a perfect embryo into me in the perfect place at the perfect time under all the perfect conditions. Everything was perfect. But this little baby did not grow.

This proves that medicine can only go so far. That is where the true miracle comes in. God plays the biggest part. His goodness, His timing, His miracles. And that is how I know that all babies are truly miracles, no matter how they are conceived or who they are born to. No matter what.

But I will still question - Why can't I have another miracle?

So, I allowed myself to be sad and angry. I knew I didn't want to feel that for long, but I knew it was okay to feel that way for now. And so I cried and cried....a lot. I suddenly felt jealous of the many women I know who are pregnant. And more than anything I felt stupid for putting myself through all of this again, thinking we would easily become pregnant from this transfer. Before we had started the whole process, I told myself to not be over confident that this would work since our first IVF did work and we had our baby twins. I knew there was no guarantee it was work again right away. I didn't want to feel crushed if we weren't pregnant, so I tried to prepare myself for the fact that we may not be. But I don't think it helped, because I still felt utterly defeated.

Why do we have to spend thousands and thousands of dollars, spend so much time, and go through so many emotions with the hormones/medications I am on just for the CHANCE to get pregnant? Just for the CHANCE. But, there are no guarantees. It is a gamble. And I definitely felt the crush of that. And since we have no more insurance coverage for reproductive medicine, we pay for everything out of pocket. Literally thousands and thousands of dollars with nothing to show and no miracle growing inside of me.

The next day, my feelings turned from feeling so desperately sad for me to being so desperately sad for others. And I felt upset with myself for being so sad because I do have 2 little miracles, when so many couples out there may never even have their one miracle. So, I tried to focus on Elijah and Will. Even though we want more children, if we never do have more children, I could be thankful I was able to experience my twins. And I know that having twins is something so very extraordinary in itself. Something that the majority of people will never have the pleasure of experiencing. I am grateful for that.

But, it seems that when you want a baby, you want a baby. And the pain is still there, no matter if you already do have children or not. Yes, it is different, but the pain and want is still so vividly there.

I know that Nick and my infertility journey is so different than everyone else's. Many couple's infertility journeys are much much worse. They may have unexplained infertility and the doctors can't find anything to "fix." Many women have endometriosis or Polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) and may not ever be able to become pregnant. Or there are women who are able to become pregnant, but may have ectopic pregnancies or are unable to carry a baby to term. Some people aren't able to use their own sperm/eggs and need to use them from a donor. Many couples are unable to try any treatments because the cost is too high and nothing is covered by medical insurance. Why? Why? WHY?

Why can so many people...so much more deserving than I, not get pregnant?

It's not fair. I know life isn't fair. And it breaks my heart. My heart truly aches for these women and men. If you are struggling, waiting, and praying for your miracle, please know I pray for you each and every day. I honestly do.

And I will continue to think of and pray for you everyday for the rest of my life.

The days and weeks following finding out we weren't pregnant after the FET, were a mix of happy and sad. Some days have been harder than others, but there has always been hope in my days. I felt so sad for the little baby that could have been, but I was grateful for the 2 little miracles I do have. I am choosing to stay positive. I am choosing to keep moving forward. And I know that someday, somehow, we will hold another baby in our arms, if it is God's will.

So, even through the pain, the questions, the heartache, the suffering...I am choosing to have faith in God's plan and timing. I will trust in the perfect plan He has for our family. And I take comfort that He knows me, He feels what I am feeling right along with me, and He will never leave my side. I am not alone.

And no matter what your journey is, I pray you trust in His perfect plan for your life. I hope you take comfort that He knows you, He feels what you are feeling right along with you, and He will never leave your side. You are not alone.

There is a purpose, there is a reason.

And it will be worth the wait.

TO BLOG OR NOT TO BLOG

If you are an avid follower of my blog, you may have noticed that my updated posts are few and far between.

This is because I don't have the time and I don't have the energy.

The main reason I started this blog was to share my story in hopes of touching lives. I wanted to share my infertility story, to give even if just one person: faith, comfort, and hope to know they are not alone among their journeys.

Along the way, I found it to be very therapeutic for me to write and see my feelings written on paper. I know I'm not the greatest writer and my grammar is far from perfect, but I have always wanted to simply write from the heart. I wanted to write about happy times and sad times. The good, the bad, and the ugly. I wanted to be honest and open.

I wanted to be me.

And I feel like I have done all that. And for that I am proud. I am extremely far from perfect and unfortunately, I have horribly low self-esteem, but I can say I am proud for sharing myself so openly with the world.

I am extremely grateful I started my blog. What powerful words and feelings I had through all those years. I truly cherish being able to look back and read what was going on in my life: the extreme heartache of infertility, to the stresses of IVF, and then to adjusting to life with baby twins.

When I glance back and randomly read an old post, it's incredible how the feelings come rushing back. And I know if I hadn't wrote them down, that they would be long forgotten. I would hardly remember anything, because that's how we cope as humans. After time, the feelings and memories fade...whether happy or sad. But they won't fade as much for me. Because I have my feelings on paper. (Or actually on computer!) I know many people don't want to remember the pain, but I do. It gets me through the hard days now of raising crazy toddler twin boys. Are there are a lot of hard days. I can read about how badly I prayed and ached to have a child of my own. I remember every doctor appointment and every shot. I remember never knowing if I would hold my own child in my arms. I remember the tears. And I remember the smiles. I remember watching the screen as two embryos were inserted into my uterus. I remember the joy after our ultrasound and seeing two placentas, which meant: two babies.

And one thing that I always, always remember and feel in my heart when reading my blog is hope. Because there is always, always, always hope.

I love my blog.

It gives me hope.

And I pray it's given many people hope.

And I love the fact that people have been blessed by my blog. Even though I don't hear from people often, I know the ones that I have heard from are truly grateful. They've become lifelong friends. And we have strengthened each other through our journeys, as similar and as different as they are.

I am thankful for the "life traffic feed" on my blog, because without it, I probably would think that no one reads my blog. (Not even my own family.) I don't get typed "comments" under my blog posts very often, so there were times I wondered if anyone was reading it. But, it's amazing to see how often and from where people are reading my blog. They are from all over the country and across the world!

But I am stressed.

I don't have time to write and I don't have the energy to write.

Those two things weigh heavily on my heart. Because I want to blog, I really do. I want to continue writing so I can remember the good and bad I experienced while raising twins. But I also know that I can't let blogging stress me out. Because if it is stressing me out, the good probably doesn't outweigh the bad. So, I know that this may be something I need to give up. Or at least put on hold, until I have the time and energy again.

There are so many things I want to write about and those unfinished items on my ever growing "to do" checklist weigh on my mind. Just more and more things that I am not accomplishing. After normal life daily happenings with the twins, cooking, cleaning, having my own online craft business (www.vincellidesigns.com), church activities, and volunteering, etc. there just isn't any time left. I often tell my husband that I just want to be able to sometimes watch tv or read a book without having feeling so guilty while doing so because all of my other things weighing on my mind that I need to accomplish first. I want to be able to relax. And unfortunately, writing blog posts is not relaxing for me anymore.

I wish I could do it all. I wish I had more time. But I know I need to focus more on my family. I am suffering. They are suffering. My life is passing by. I don't want to look back on this time of my life and wish I had done it differently. So, I need to live for today. I need to find joy in each and every day. And if I'm stressed, I know this will be difficult to do. So, I am praying about which things I need to "let go."

This blog may be one of those things that I will let go.

I'm having an extremely hard time letting go. It's never easy, is it?

But I want to thank you for caring enough to follow my story. You have touched my life. You've touched my family's life.

I am blessed. I am grateful. I WILL find the joy in every day.

God Bless!
Amy

SANTA FUN?

I'm not sure if we can really say that seeing Santa is fun for Eli and Will. But I have to admit, I don't mind the crying photos. :)

The boys would not let go of us. They were terrified. Very terrified. Will was actually clawing at my back with his arms tight around me when I tried to pull him off to even go to Nick.

And being the good parents we are, we forced photos upon them anyway...

Here's our free Santa pic at Cabela's. I didn't want to be in it, but oh well. At this point Eli was hysterical...and of course my eyes are closed...

I was able to peel Will off me to get a photo of all of them by Santa with my camera. At this point Will was hysterical.

But Will settled down fast enough to give Santa a high five! This pic is adorable!

And how could I not post these photos from last year? The boys were 15 months then. As you can clearly see, the boys were not big fans of Santa then either!

Here's the Cabela's Santa...

And the ECFE Santa...

These photos make me laugh...does that make me a bad parent? :)

That's okay they aren't big fans of Santa.

We know Jesus has us covered.

Happy Birthday, Jesus! Merry Christmas!

MERRY CHRISTMAS 2012 FROM THE VINCELLI FAMILY

As we celebrate the birth of our Lord & Savior, we give thanks for another precious year together as a family surrounded with so many people we love & adore. Life is busy & sometimes absolutely crazy. But we are healthy & we are happy. We are grateful...we are blessed. Here is what happened in our 2012~

Learned what life is like with 2 busy toddlers who run in opposite directions. They can run fast. Really fast. Survived flying with two 18 month old boys to Florida. Vacationed on Sanibel Island with the Hess family and Cox grandparents. Didn’t want to leave. Will be back again. Dr. Nick celebrated 3 years at Horizon Eye Care here in Owatonna. Very grateful for his career that he enjoys. Eli and Will have gone to daycare a few mornings a week with our friend, Lisa, aka: the best daycare provider EVER! Amy is thankful for a break from the boys while she crafts. And the twins enjoy a break from mommy too. It’s a win-win for all. Amy celebrated 3 years with her online craft business, “Vincelli Designs & Decor” www.vincellidesigns.com. Business has really picked up this year and she is very thankful to do what she loves. Vacationed in Detroit Lakes with the entire Vincelli family for our annual golf vacation. Continue to do most everything in twos. Continue to do most everything in twos. (That is not a typo.) Celebrated Eli and Will’s 2nd Birthday in September. Questioned how we have survived 2 years of raising multiples. Are currently potty training two 26 month olds. Use your imagination. They are boys remember. It’s quite an adventure. But like we said, even with some rough times (no one told us parenting was so hard!)...we are grateful...we are blessed. Merry Christmas! Jesus is the Reason for the Season!

The Vincelli Family
~ Nick, Amy, Elijah, & Will ~

FIRST TIME PLAYING IN THE SNOW!

You'd think since we live in Minnesota and with it being December and all, that we'd already have a lot of snow. Well, no, not at all. And I have been dreaming of a white Christmas. I wasn't just dreaming of it, I was literally praying for it. It just doesn't seem like Christmas without snow...

Here's a photo of our house that I took on December 6th. No snow. And in fact, our grass is greener now than it was this summer. For real. Greener. A lot greener. Weird.

But on December 8th, we finally started getting snow. And we got to play outside. Yippee! My dream come true. It was Eli and Will's first time playing in the snow. (They did get out in the sleds once last winter, but that was only for about 10 minutes. We hardly had any snow last year either.)

It only took 20 minutes to get them all bundled up and ready...

First we put them to work. (One of the perks of having twins...twice the free labor.)

Then we let them play. :)

And boy, did they have a blast! They were giggling and so full of joy. We played outside for a long time.

They built their first snowman together...

We pulled them around in sleds on our street...

I adore my little family!

And I adore my amazing husband!

Here's to hoping that all the snow doesn't melt before Christmas...

2 Years, 2 Months, 2 Weeks, 2 Days!

Today, the twins are 2 years, 2 months, 2 weeks, and 2 days old!

I'm not some crazy person....seriously, I'm not! I just happened to notice this on the birthday counter on the top of my blog page. It lists how old the twins are. I'm so glad I noticed it!

Because...

We seem to like to do things around here in 2's. Gee...I wonder why? Two of this, two of that. Change one diaper, change the other diaper. Give one a kiss, give the other a kiss. Pull one down from climbing on the table, pull the other one from climbing on the table. You get the idea!

So it's only appropriate that we celebrate a day full of TWO's! :)

Happy 2 Years, 2 Months, 2 Weeks, and 2 Days my little happy, happy boys: Will & Eli!

This morning we put the ornaments on the Christmas tree. They were overjoyed!

You can see just how proud they are!

Eli

Will

Happy Belated Thanksgiving from my little Native American and Pilgrim!

We give thanks for our precious miracles, Elijah and Will. We give thanks for our faith, family, and friends. We give thanks for our home, clothing, and food. We give thanks for our health. We give thanks we live in a free country where we can freely attend church and worship our awesome God.

We are blessed beyond measure.

God bless you and yours this Christmas season!

SLOW DOWN, MOMMY, & SOAK IT ALL IN

I had a sweet moment tonight with my Eli. It's as if he was telling me, "Slow down, mommy, and soak it all in..."


Something was a little off and he cried and cried while trying to fall asleep. It was an uncontrollable, gagging cry which was slowly breaking my heart. I finally took Eli out of his crib and held him in my arms on my bed so Will could fall asleep in his crib.


In the dark, for the first time in over one whole year, I held my little toddler boy to put him to sleep and soaked it all in. This is a rare occurrence, you see, as I haven't held him to get him to fall asleep since he was a little over a year old. That was when we finally let the twins cry it out and ever since then, they easily fall asleep on their own with no tears. They just do not fall asleep in our arms at all. I am forever grateful that they fall asleep nicely on their own because we went through 13 months of being up many many times each night and spending way way way too long holding them to get them to fall asleep for all naps and at bedtime. (It was torture and I could go on and on and on about that. And if you're super bored, you can read this blog post about our Operation Cry It Out!) But I will warn you, it's very long!


Although, just the other day, I was thinking about how sweet it would be to cuddle them and have them fall asleep in my arms just every once in a while. I wondered what it would be like to hold a sleeping baby in my arms again. And here was my chance. I smelled his hair and patted his bottom as he whimpered every so often. His little sighs ended with a quiet, little laugh. He was happy to be in his momma's arms, so content. And I was overjoyed to have him there, so content. I soaked it all in.


I thought about how this could be a last. I may not ever have the chance to hold a sleeping baby or toddler of mine again. There's no guarantee I can get pregnant again. There's no guarantee anyone can ever get pregnant again. I though about him and only him. I soaked it all in.


I somehow forgot about the billion other things I could be getting done at that exact moment. I was just there...with him...feeling his breathing on my chest. Feeling peace...feeling joy. I gave thanks for my precious miracle. I soaked it all in.


Moments like this are limited and precious. And I know they should be occurring more often than they do. And that is all only because I need to slow down. I need to soak it all in. Slow down, Amy, and live in the moment!


As Elijah's breathing slowed down and he started lightly snoring, I kissed the back of his head. I laid him back down in his crib and proceeded to listen to Will jabber to himself for one whole hour longer. One whole hour until 9:30pm! That little stinker didn't want to fall asleep. But I soaked that in too. I know there will be day when he won't jabber to himself and I will long for those sounds again.


I am grateful for these moments tonight: The little reminder from my Eli to "slow down, mommy and soak it all in." And also the little reminder from my Will, that even if he's not asleep by the time he should be, I can still "slow down and soak it all in."

OPERATION CHRISTMAS CHILD

Samaritan's Purse is a non-denominational evangelical Christian humanitarian organization that works worldwide to meet the spiritual and physical needs of people suffering from war, poverty, disaster, disease, famine, and persecution.

One of their ongoing ministries is: Operation Christmas Child. OCC is a 'global Christmas gift exchange' project operated by Samaritan's Purse. Each November it opens thousands of locations, typically at churches or schools, to collect shoeboxes filled with toys, school supplies, personal items, and other gifts. These boxes are then distributed as Christmas gifts, accompanied by Christian literature.

From 1993 through 2008, some 69 million gift boxes have been handed out in more than 130 countries. AMAZING!

Each year our church, Good Shepherd Lutheran, collects shoes boxes for "Operation Christmas Child." A friend of mine, Tammy, leads this up each year at Good Shepherd. What a blessing she is! This is the 5th year Nick and I have packed shoeboxes to donate. It fills my heart with so much joy to do this each year. Such a simple yet loving gift that will touch the hearts of many. The main goal is to teach these precious children about a loving God who sent His son, Jesus, to die for our sins. Many of them have never heard about Jesus. These wonderful gifts help spread the good news of our Lord and Savior!

And this year was especially special because we took Eli and Will shopping to buy the items and then we filled the boxes together. I know they don't fully understand what these gifts are, but we talked about how they are going to children who don't have many toys or school supplies. And also how this will help these children learn about Jesus, which is the best gift of all and what Christmas is all about.

Click here to learn more about packing your own box: Operation Christmas Child - Samaritan's Purse

Here are some photos of Elijah and Will packing their shoe boxes. We made one for a boy and one for a girl! We purchased lots of fun things to put in them: pencils, paper, pencil sharpeners, toothbrushes, toothpaste, washcloths, jump ropes, socks, balls, hair ties, puzzles, combs, toys, crayons, candy, watches, and a letter from our family.

We had to do a little reorganizing:

Will

Eli

Our family encourages you to pack a shoebox or two and touch the lives of children all over the world. Please ask me if you have any questions. God bless you!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN 2012

I found these two cute little "things" running around our house.

So we decided to take them trick-or-treating. :)

We already had the Thing 1 ~ Thing 2 t-shirts. Then add red pants we also already had. So, all I had to make was the blue wigs. I bought two blue feather boas and hot glued them to $1 blue winter hats from Walmart. They looked awesome! So easy, fun, and inexpensive to make. My only mistake was that I forgot to have the boys try on the hats before I hot glued the boas to them. As you can see, they didn't fit quite well. Oops. Oh well, it worked.

All ready to go!

The one house we trick-or-treated at: Uncle Barry & Auntie Jesse's. Which was crazy as they had hundreds of children trick-or-treat down their street. When we pulled up in the minivan, I felt like I was in a movie. It looked just like a Halloween trick-or-treating scene. I always thought seeing so many kids trick-or-treating wasn't realistic, but apparently it is. Wow! I even had to direct Nick backing up the van when we were leaving so we didn't run any little kids over!

Cousins!

They were a bit upset when kids were coming to our door and taking away "their" candy. Oh my...oh my! They both were crying and screaming "candy, candy!" Maybe they'll understand it better next year.

Even with the tears, we had a wonderful Halloween. I love experiencing all these fun times through the eyes of two sweet little boys.