Our precious boys...

Our precious boys...

Thursday, May 21, 2009


I admit I’m sort of a Mother’s Day Grinch. This year was my third Mother’s Day while going through infertility. I thought it would get easier, but no such luck. For the past two years, I’ve tried to convince myself that “this will be the last Mother’s Day that I won’t be a mother, because next year I’ll be pregnant!” But it hasn’t come true yet.

As Mother’s Day approaches, so does the dread. Some may think holidays such as Christmas or Thanksgiving, would be much more difficult. But to me, they’re not at all. Mother’s Day to those suffering from infertility basically feels like a punch in the face. It’s just another reminder of how we are somehow physically constrained in ways that most people are not. I would imagine it is difficult for single women who aren’t married, for mothers who have lost children, and for those who have lost their mothers, etc. There are a lot of people to remember on Mother’s Day, other than “current” mothers. As a woman, we all have that motherly instinct. Maybe it should be called “Women’s Day.”

Yes, we adore our mothers and want to celebrate them on this special day. But of course, there’s that self-pity we can’t get over, if even just for this one day. Don’t get me wrong, I do understand that not everything is centered around me and my inability to procreate. But on Mother’s Day, it seems that it is just exactly that. It’s like the world’s laughing at you because you’re one of those few poor suckers that can’t become a mommy.

I find myself dreading going to church because all they’ll talk about is how precious and lovely it is to be a mother…about how one of God’s greatest gifts is that of motherhood. They may give a message based on Psalm 127. In the third verse it says, “Sons are a heritage from the Lord, children a reward from him.” It makes you feel unworthy that you aren’t a mother. I just wish for once in the prayers, they would mention those who someday will be mothers…

On every Mother’s Day, I encourage you to celebrate all women! Those who have been mothers, currently are mothers, and those who want to be mothers. Don’t forget about those who are suffering with infertility. Truthfully, in our hearts, we already are mothers, we just need a baby to prove that fact.

So, Happy Mother’s Day to all of you blessed enough to be a mother. (I’m only a tad bit bitter!)

1 comment:

  1. I would agree, Mother's and Father's day were incredibly difficult for us.